Significant Repeated Injuries

[LindyL]

I need advice for a lady I help take care of who has MS. I have been helping with her care for a year, in her home. In that time, she has broken her leg, her arm, her nose, torn ligaments in her knees, given herself first and second degree burns, and other misc injuries. Her injuries all occur when I am not at the house and each injury has been a separate occurence. She is in a wheelchair, except when she transfers. She and her husband live alone and he is out of town working at least 50% of the time. So, she is alone quite a bit. Her cognitive reasoning and judgement are not good. She takes a lot of meds, including meth, oxy, valium. I frequently find these meds scattered everywhere. My question: Is it normal for someone with MS to incur so many significant injuries, so often? Thank you for any input.

[Redwings]

No, Lindy, it isn't normal. And even if it were, that wouldn't make it all right. Any one of those injuries by itself would be enough for many doctors to recommend that the person go into assisted living or have full-time help. The fact that this lady is still living at home and being left alone implies that there's something significant going on that you haven't told us about or that you don't know about.

This lady is clearly not capable of being left alone. An argument can be made that leaving her alone when she obviously isn't able to care for herself amounts to neglect. Under the law, people with disabilities are frequently given the same considerations and protections as senior citizens. So an argument can be made that this situation is an eldercare issue.

Are you helping take care of this lady informally, as a friend of the family, or are you a home assistance aid working there through an agency? In either case, the law may require that you report the "neglect" of a senior or disabled person to local authorities. And this is where it isn't clear why her doctors -- who must know about the injuries -- haven't intervened.

If you're a home assistance aid working through an agency, you should report the situation to you superiors, who can follow up from there with her husband, doctors and social agencies. If you're simply helping out informally, your situation is a bit trickier. Her husband is fully aware of what's happened. And from you post, it isn't clear if he's dealing with the situation by working out of town and avoiding it, or if he has to work out of town to pay you to come in and he can't afford to do anything else. Either way, it obviously isn't enough. So dealing with him can be a very delicate task.

You might, on your own, investigate what services are available through your local Area Agency on Aging and chapter of the National Multiple Sclerosis Society. But no matter what happens, her husband will have to become involved, as will her doctors. And that might be more than you can coordinate by yourself.

You should also be prepared for the possibility that her husband will resent the intrusion into his and his wife's "privacy." But if you think of this as an eldercare situation, it might influence whether you go to your employer first, her husband first, or a social worker at an eldercare agency first.

Bless you for caring so much for this lady. It's obvious that something more has to be done to help her. I wish you all the best no matter what route of intervention you decide on.

[Cat Mom]

Lindy, I echo everything Redwings has said, mostly "Bless you" for caring so much as to seek out others' thoughts and opinions.

It sounds like she's on some hard core meds. Is it possible that they make her forget she is in a wheelchair or even forget she has MS? It is definitely not normal to sustain so many major injuries... even for a clutz that has MS like me!

I really hate to say this but I think you need to report these injuries to someone of authority for her sake and yours. You don't want to end up in a situation where you could possibly be blamed for either causing these injuries or neglecting her where she can cause them herself.

It's awful that a caregiver has to cover their legal butt but if her hubby is away 50% of the time I don't know how well received your info might be if you speak to him only.

I'm not sure how these legalities work in the US but here, any document or correspondence that crosses the path of social services is considered a legal document. If you plan on reporting her injuries to someone, it might be a good idea to create a paper trail. It's so unfortunate but it's reality, especially if she's having cognitive issues coupled with strong meds.

[Cat Mom]

Sorry Lindy, I hit "submit reply" before finishing. I just wanted to tell you that people like you are angels. I hope you find some resolution to this awful situation soon. Please let us know how you make out.
Jen

[LindyL]

Thank you for your reply.

I work for her, privately, for 2-3 hrs a day, Mon thru Fri. I do not work for an agency. I have been a caregiver since 2006, when I was with an agency, and have never run across a situation like this. These repeated, significant injuries are very disturbing to me, and each one of her injuries have been avoidable, if she had proper care. I do not feel she should be left alone, and have tried to tell her and her husband that, but they are adamant about her not going into assisted living, and they actually think all these accidents and injuries are normal. PT and OT come to the house two times a week, but it seems like a waste of everyones time, because none of the suggestions OT gives and none of the exercises PT gives, are ever implemented, once they leave.

This lady has many Drs, and I would think they share her medical notes/charts, so they would all know about these injuries. I just don't know.

As far as her husband; he has to travel for his work. I do not believe he travels to avoid the situation at home. They are financially in very good shape. Providing every aspect of her care is no monetary problem for them.

So, it seems to come down to they want to keep her out of assisted living, but do not want to provide adequate care for her at home. I have suggested they get a live-in, but they won't consider that. As for myself, I do not want more than my 2-3 hrs there. The way things are going, its just a big accident waiting to happen.

Again, I really appreciate your reply. I wasn't sure if these kind of accidents and injuries were "normal" occurences for MS. It sure didn't seem right to me. Guess I will have to figure this all out myself. Thank you.

[LindyL]

I forgot to say that OT and PT comes two times per week, only when the lady's injuries have healed. So, its definately not every week. Also, she takes a lot, lot more meds than just the oxy, meth, and valium. I don't know how they all inter-act. Thank you again for replying to my concern.

[Seasha]

Lindy~ This is so alarming! You should not have to figure this out by yourself as you stated. If the PT and OT come to the house 2x/week, surely they have also noticed the injuries! Maybe it's time to get in touch with them and brainstorm a plan together. You may not work for an agency, but I assume they do. Something needs to be done (reported) soon, especially with the drugs she is taking! And take photos for documentation in case there are conflicting arguments or perceptions.

The accident "waiting to happen" may result in her death - to put it bluntly!

Bless you

[Mynamegoeshere1]

I am not sure of legalities due to HIPPA, but even as a privately employed caregiver part-time, I would think you would be able to report this to her Neurologist at the least and if you could find the other Dr's names to give him, that would get the ball rolling for them to all come together and realize what is going on. This is a very delicate situation, but I worked in a high school clinic once. This is just as important as a kid coming in with bruises and multiple injuries. We are required by law to report these instances to be investigated. I really hope you contact someone and get her help before it is too late.