I lost a Saint yesterday

**Fed Up** · 03-06-2014, 01:46 AM

My next door neighbor and someone, over 2 years, I grew to love more than anyone I've ever known. Jim Bo...I miss him more than words can say.

I moved to where I currently live and 3 days later, i was ill. Never getting to know my neighbors or anyone..Just Jim. He gave me sage advice he looked over me and protected me. He saw my strength and let me do as I was and stepped in when he saw I wasn't 'gettin it done' and gently assisted. When I was sick, even before I knew him, he was here doing some emergency plumbing and other things.

Most of all, he was such a compassionate, kind and happy person. He is the guy that would stop at the roadside and help stranded motorists.

I thought my garden didn't grow weeds. After I had been here a few months and remained inside and just leaving for supplies, when I was able. I looked out my kitchen window one morning at 6:30A.M.--My little dog was acting funny, there Jim was, pulling the weeds out of my flower beds. Which turned into a full time gardener, errand runner and taking me to appointments, etc.

The night my car broke down, the next morning he was at my front door with the keys to his car and it was in my driveway. He managed to take care of my needs, when I was so sick and unable or even too sick to care.

Jan 2, was his birthday, I found out on the first; Another neighbor and I used the clubhouse for a last minute surprise birthday party for him on the 4th. A last minute party that over 35 of his friends and neighbors attended, at the last minute. Many changed their week-end plans, just to be there, for Jim. He was 64 and far too young to leave us.

I have lost my parents, best friends and 2 brothers; nothing was as painful as this. I miss Jim and I lost a saint, yesterday.

He was the first person I was able to utter the words of, "I have M.S." to. He sadly responded,
"I lost my brother to that at the age of 47." From that day on, Jim took care of me and made sure he showed how happy he was, to be able to.

fed

**Mørphi** · 03-06-2014, 02:51 AM

I am very sorry to hear of your loss, Fed. My prayers are with you, your friend and his family & friends.

**mugs** · 03-06-2014, 03:09 AM

I'm so very sorry for the loss of your dear friend -- what a wonderful person he was!

Hugs and prayers to you during this sad time.

m

**DebbieB** · 03-06-2014, 03:16 AM

Oh Fed, I'm so sorry for your loss. What a lovely and heartfelt tribute you've written for him.

((HUGS))

**sewhappy** · 03-06-2014, 03:29 AM

Oh Fed, your friend sounds like such wonderful human being. I'm so sorry for your pain and the loss of such a dear friend.

**KatieAgain** · 03-06-2014, 04:23 AM

Oh.....Fed... ((((((HUGS))))))

I am so sorry.

**Seasha** · 03-06-2014, 06:52 AM

Oh Fed~ I am also so sorry. Your post brought tears to my eyes. Bless his sweet soul

You were a good friend to him as well. I am sending you prayers of strength as you mourn. You will always cherish this friendship and will always keep the memories alive.

Why not plant a small shrub or perennial flowers in his memory?

Big hugs to you,
Seasha

**Cat Mom** · 03-06-2014, 02:11 PM

I'm so sorry Fed. He sounds like a beautiful soul.
Jen

**misslux** · 03-06-2014, 05:50 PM

I am so sorry. I remember you telling us about what a wonderful person he was.

**Fed Up** · 03-06-2014, 11:01 PM

thank YOU all so very much for your kind words. It is my hope to share such a compassionate caring person with the world.

He was my rock and he was that for many.

he had gallbladder removed with the "blind" procedure, last week on Tues. He was sent home in the evening and was home about 4 hours and went back by ambulance.

They kept him 5 days and pumped him full of drugs. Sent him home last Saturday and about 10 hours later, at 3AM, he went to a closer facility in an ambulance and not Loma Linda Medical University Center the one that did the surgery--. The ambulance took him to Redlands Community, Sunday at 3AM

Redlands C did an exploratory surgery and found bile all thru his belly. LLUMC nicked something during the surgery and didn't even search for this common complication of that type of surgery.

His b/p dropped during the exploratory surgery (probably because it was the first time he was pain free in 2 months); so, they closed him up and left him on a respirator.

His g/f took his DNR papers in and they removed life support. He was in a medically induced coma, that often works to control infection..over time. He was only 48 hours into the treatment, when life support was removed.

I feel so sad and this is the reason I have trouble signing my own, DNR. Something like that can be fixed without much trouble.
fed

**Fed Up** · 03-06-2014, 11:12 PM

Originally Posted by misslux

I am so sorry. I remember you telling us about what a wonderful person he was.

Jim only had to look at me and I felt loved!

Never have I ever, experienced that-in my life! I loved him more than I knew! He made me feel special, just to hear him say my name.

I certainly appreciated him and tried to show it. It is my hope he knew that. Last night a neighbor introduced me to his neighbors on the other side of the park; As soon as, that guy said, "...she lives next door to Jim." both women said, "Finally, you are the Sandy he always talked about."

That made me feel good and warm, all over! I never held his hand or even hugged him; He had a g/f and I respected that. He made me feel loved and so special.

fed

**bree2013** · 03-07-2014, 03:02 PM

Fed, so sorry for the loss of such a wonderful friend. He sounded like an exceptional person - you both were lucky to have had such a friendship.

Be well,
Bree

**lavenderteawithme_33** · 03-07-2014, 07:53 PM

Fed,

Sorry for your loss. Your friend sounds like he was a jewel of a man.
Your in my thoughts.

**tommylee** · 03-07-2014, 08:42 PM

Originally Posted by Fed Up

Jim only had to look at me and I felt loved!

That made me feel good and warm, all over! I never held his hand or even hugged him; He had a g/f and I respected that. He made me feel loved and so special.

fed

That is a big loss. Very sad for you.
Sounds like it would be difficult to convey the depth of this loss to friends and neighbors do to the secret understood love between the two of you?
I hope you do not feel too alone.

There are few special people that touch our lives and stand out in our memories forever.

**Fed Up** · 03-08-2014, 02:24 AM

thank You all for your comforting posts. That helps, more than you know.

Everyone needs a friend like Jim Bo.

He would stop at the side of the road and help people, even returning home to get tools or gas cans and go back to help stranded motorists.

He treated Everyone as a special person.

When the uprising in Syria started, I was down and sick, not watching much news. I was talking to him outside and he said he had to go watch the news to see what was happening to the people.

I asked him what was going on and he replied; "Their just killing people in Syria." Then he was really sad and said, "poor people." In such a way with so much concern, of people all over the world.

He was a saint to people that didn't even know him.

fed

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